Spiritual abuse runs rampant throughout the Christian community. What is spiritual abuse exactly? The term basically encompasses hurting another person, projecting fear upon the person or attempting to control the other person through the use of the Bible and scripture. Spiritual abusers are often aware of their behavior and intentionally seek out ways to manipulate others who may not know or understand the Bible well. This behavior is completely counter to what the Bible instructs Christians to do. Anyone in good faith would first seek to share the Gospel over condemnation. There is nothing wrong with rebuking a behavior, but being a spiritual abuser does not coincide with the act of rebuking.
I have seen the work of spiritual abusers firsthand many of times. When the behavior of a spiritual abuser is addressed, often the default response of the individual is to instantly point the situation back on yourself through slander or attacking your character. One of the favorite past times of this type of individual is to gas light situations. Biblical gas lighting is a manipulation tactic done over time to influence an individual and diminish their self confidence in the way that the person understands and processes scripture. One of the best ways to put a biblical gas lighter in their place is through truth. Speaking truth often requires the person to stand firm on their convictions while being relentlessly attacked.
Since we know that most people doubt themselves, have insecurities and want to be nonconfrontational, we know that biblical gas lighters often have a free-for-all without any accountability or resistance. These biblical bullies go unchecked and continue to use the word of God as a weapon against others. One way to remove doubt in your mind is to read and understand your Bible. If you have a firm foundation of what your Bible says, it is way harder for someone to attack you with the Bible. Spiritual abusers pray on people who often do not read their Bible nor study the word of God. When you find yourself in this situation, you must put on the full armor of God.
Ephesians 6:10-18 New American Standard Bible
The Armor of God
10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might. 11 Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil. 12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places. 13 Therefore, take up the full armor of God, so that you will be able to resist on the evil day, and having done everything, to stand firm. 14 Stand firm therefore, having belted your waist with truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness, 15 and having strapped on your feet the preparation of the gospel of peace; 16 in addition to all, taking up the shield of faith with which you will be able to extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. 17 And take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.
Spiritual abusers need to be called out.
In my life, one of the biggest times of spiritual abuse was during covid. Many people quickly fell prey to spiritual abuse from pastors, elders, friends, family, neighbors, co-workers, etc. One of the most weaponized Bible verses used was love thy neighbor. The verse was often used to belittle behaviors, shut down opposing views, project fear, manipulate, distort, lie and attack brothers and sisters. This evil and demonic behavior was often done by people whom you trusted, thought that you could trust or wanted to trust. The biblical spiritual abusers put their feelings and emotions over that of those who had differing views so much so that anyone who spoke up against these unbiblical behaviors was often gas lighted and relentlessly attacked.
I could make a long list of attacks that I witnessed first-hand during this time. The behavior demonstrated by many individuals was appalling and irrational. There is no difference of opinion when a spiritual abuser takes a verse out of context, adds or deletes words from the verse and spins it off as biblical truth. I get tired of people making excuses for biblical abusers. They need to be publicly rebuked for their actions. There needs to be accountability. What I saw during this time was the same behavior that many people have seen when they walked into a church or interacted with Christians. The behavior was gas lighting biblical spiritual abusers.
It sickens me to know that many people have been treated like this by so-called-Christians. I say so-called because they sure do not act the part, nor do they bear any fruit that would even resemble what they claim to be. The trust has been broken with many people including myself. There are lots of people who claim to be a Christian that I do not trust one bit. I have seen their behaviors on full display. I have witnessed what these individuals do when put in a position of self-imposed fear. Self-preservation is the only language that these people understand. Manipulation will go as far as it has to in order to get their way. I want no part of this. Many other people who have been attacked by Christians want no part of this.
For those of you reading this who feel this way, let me tell you that I understand where you are coming from. I am not going to encourage you to go along to get along. I will however encourage you to build your own relationship with Jesus outside of needless distractions of spiritual abusers. Personal growth occurs when an individual seeks out Jesus on their own through prayer and reading the word of God. God will give you the tools that you need to find him, all you have to do is seek him out. Don’t put your faith in others as they will constantly fail you. Don’t sour to the Gospel because you have been the victim of spiritual abuse. Seek God and he will find you where you are at in life.